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Allegory of the Uninvited Guest

  • Allegory of the Uninvited Guest

  • 20 May 2007 by 0 Comments

Allegory of the Uninvited Guest
By Richard Larsen
Published – Idaho State Journal, 05/20/07

I have many friends who have much nicer homes than I do. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to live in such a nice home as my friend Steve has. I just can’t afford to buy a house like that, but I really do want to improve my life, and that of my family, and living in a house like Steve’s could be just the ticket.

Perhaps what I’ll do is simply break into Steve’s house and stake a claim. After breaking in I’ll clean the house, mow the lawns, and do the dishes and the laundry. You know, all the jobs he doesn’t like to do. When he comes home, he may be upset to find me in his home, but I’ll simply point out all the good honest work I’ve done before he discovered me there, and tell him all I want to do is work and stay in his place until I want to leave. I do honest labor, and the fact that I’ve illegally entered his house should have no relevance to the discussion. Now Steve may actually speak a different language than I do, so I may need an interpreter to translate all this for me.

By this time I’m kind of on a roll. I need to get a little more assertive in my position of advantage here. Not only am I going to insist that he has to let me stay in his house, but he needs to add me and my family to his insurance plan . He needs to educate my children, and he has to cater to my language of preference. I have no intention of learning his language, so he needs to make signs around his house in my language, and make sure that the telephone and the computer are geared to my language as well.

Steve may not like this proposal that much, but I think I know how I can convince him that it’s right. If he tries to kick me out or call the police to have me removed, I’ll just tell him that I’m going to have all my friends bring protest signs and create a massive demonstration declaring to the world how evil he is for trying to keep me out of his house and how I have a right to be there. They’ll declare to the neighborhood and the world that I deserve to be there, because I’m an honest worker (except for that little part about breaking into his house), and all I want to do is to improve my station in life.

I’ll also prey on his emotions, and convince him that he’s a bigot or a racist if he doesn’t accept me with all my conditions.

Oh, and there is another little thing. Since I’m illegally in his house, when he puts me on his payroll I can’t make any contributions toward the cost of me staying there and mooching off his insurance plan and healthcare plan. But I must insist that in spite of that, I have to be given benefits for when I want to retire and stay in his house until I die. After all, he has a big house, virtually unlimited financial resources, (or so it seems), and I am going to be doing all those jobs he doesn’t like or want to do.

It shouldn’t bother Steve at all that when I broke in I stole his identity and that of his family. I needed one of those legal nine-digit numbers so I could get a drivers license and get a job, and a credit card, and his number seemed to be as good as any. Especially with that nice big house, his number will probably give me a good credit rating, too.

There is one other little thing that he may not like. I did notice when I broke into Steve’s home that some other rather nefarious looking characters from other foreign countries broke in at the same time. They were talking crazy about things like “jihad,” and were yelling “Allah Akbar” all the time. They didn’t seem to be the honest (other than the breaking in part) hard workers that I obviously am. But I’m sure they’ll be just fine. They certainly won’t cause any trouble, even though they broke in just like I did.

As ludicrous as this hypothetical scenario may appear, the allegory should be readily apparent. This is the situation of the illegal aliens in our country. They come here illegally, and we are to provide them health care, education, Social Security benefits, and cater to their language preferences. I hope the parable puts it into more comprehensible terms for you.

The most disturbing aspect of this scenario is the fact that Congress and the President have agreed tentatively on the terms of an immigration reform bill that will grant virtual amnesty to millions of illegals in our country. Not only is their proposed amnesty ludicrous, but it’s dangerous, inasmuch as many thousands of those illegals are Islamic extremists who pose legitimate security threats to shopping centers, college campuses, amusement parks, and ball games.

Some of our national legislators will undoubtedly claim that the proposed legislation is not “amnesty” to give temporary legal status to illegal aliens. Yet amnesty is explicitly “a general pardon of offenses against a government.” By this definition, any way you analyze it, legal status for illegals is a pardon of offenses even if a fine has to be paid for that pardon. The proposed legislation goes far beyond pardon to actually reward the offense. The violator is allowed to keep reaping the benefits of living in the United States while requiring minimal accountability for breaking the law in getting here. Rewarding bad behavior simply encourages more of it. Amnesty is no panacea, but creates a virtual Pandora’s Box of national employment problems, entitlements, health care, education caveats, and a perpetuation of linguistic challenges.

Congress’ proposed amnesty creates many more problems for the nation than it resolves. If this bill is passed and signed into law, it will perhaps be the most flagitious act by a sitting Congress in U.S. history.

Richard Larsen is President of Larsen Financial, a brokerage and financial planning firm in Pocatello, and is a graduate of Idaho State University with a BA in Political Science and History and former member of the Idaho State Journal Editorial Board. He can be reached at

About the

More than anything, I want my readers to think. We're told what to think by the education establishment, which is then parroted by politicians from the left, and then reinforced by the mainstream media. Steeped in classical liberalism, my ideological roots are based in the Constitution and our founding documents. Armed with facts, data, and correct principles, today's conservatives can see through the liberal haze and bring clarity to any political discussion.

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